It changes the World

You know, more and more I find myself feeling as though I really don't matter. The world will go on, with or without me.  Dictators will continue destroying anything or anyone that looks like hope. Evil parents will continue abusing their helpless kids.  Haiti will continue wallowing in the grasp of Satan. And Africa (As well as the rest of Europe) will shortly tailspin into the iron fist of Islam.

Hmph. It's overwhelming. And, frankly, there have been times when I've wondered if I'm not better off packing a duffel bag and sleeping under the overpass with all the other stringy-beard idealists you meet. (In case you don't know what I mean, try talking to a drunk, homeless guy for a few minutes. These guys have foreign and domestic policies figured out like no other.)

But today, I was struck by people making a huge difference:

This morning, as we were preparing to leave for church, I saw our neighbor lady herding five little kids (of different races) down the sidewalk. Dressed in their nice jeans and sweaters, the kids were enamored by the bugs and twigs and early morning fog still hovering around them as they slowly made their way down the sidewalk. 
The nearest church is at least three blocks away.  And I doubt all of those kids were her blood relatives. But there she was, leading the little ones into the arms of Jesus in spite of her lack of car or husband to walk beside her. 
Shucks, I've skipped out of church on weaker excuses.

And, at church.  I love to see how different people serve to make church happen. Like my brother-in-law that left his sick wife at home so he could make sure the piano got played.  Not that you need a piano for church, but boy does it make a difference. 

And sure, the world wouldn't have stopped today if those kids weren't walked to church. And we would've still have had church without a piano.

But there is something in this world about sowing and reaping. Something God designed in it.  And I haven't quite figured it out. But what I'm gathering is that when we do the job He's given us, the world changes for the better.

So I've unpacked my duffel bag and shaved my beard. I know my little spot in the world.
We'll haf'ta let the God take care of the rest. 
//

My Wife's quote of the night: "If it's Ravi, it's good." She stole another book from the library tonight.  I may just steal it from her.

counterpoint.

This morning I would love to be sitting at the library with a cup of coffee, my textbooks and computer. 

Two years ago I was sitting at the library with my coffee, my textbooks, my computer and a strong longing to have my own sweet little house where I could share my mornings with Joanna.

Turns out, life needs a balance of both.  Balance. That's a challenge that can last  lifetime.

//
One of the big challenges I face in switching to a shift with a 10-hour day, is that my days on and my days off are so clearly delineated.  By the time I get home at night, I am so exhausted that its hard to force myself to do anything but veg.  And my days off want to run around shopping at flea markets and go canoeing and camping - anything but pay attention to the schoolwork and paperwork that has been piling up. 

We got away for a couple of days last week to hang out with Joanna's family in Arkansas.  Frankly, it was a great break from the rut I've recently sunk into of working, vegging, poking at my computer, and sleeping. 



"Joe"

 One of my brother-in-laws captured a poor little lizard that he promptly named "Joe".  Gotta love a lizard that's willing to entertain the little guys for a couple of hours. 

Micah and I hiked through 3 miles of unmarked brush to get to the White River.  It was beautiful, rugged terrain, full of snakes (we only saw one. I screamed.) ticks, and other no-see-ums.  Frankly, I was so pooped at the end of the hike, it was good to get home.

And, of course, no family trip is complete without bedroom adventures.  Our air mattress refused to stay inflated, so once a night I'd wake up the whole house reinflating our bed. Thankfully I'm married to a girl who's tough enough (and crazy enough) to camp on the ground while pregnant, so a crazy bed can be made workable. 

//
Gavin keeps growing up so fast.  Apparently he giggled this week (I missed it), and his grins are becoming more easily coaxed.

He's also becoming a little more care-intensive.  He sleeps less during the day and more at night, which means that more of mommy's daytime is spent cuddling and talking to her little man.  She swears he has my rebellion against sleep, and I have to agree.  He fights it so hard and gets so distraught before she finally persuades his little eyes to rest.

//
I've been called 4 times in the past three days by these people who apparently keep dialing  the wrong number.  Just now she called twice. In thirty seconds.  On the second time, I said "Look, I don't mind talking to you, but let me give you my number"  I spelled it out slowly, and sarcastically added, "Now you can keep calling it if you want, but, while I really don't mind, you're not going to get anybody but me."

We'll see how long that lasts.

//
I guess I'd better get to the dishes.  My little lady got up and turned on one of Marshall's CD's and then fixed us a great little breakfast of bagels and scrambled breakfast.  So it's been a very nice quiet little morning.  Gotta' hand it to her for knowing how to create an uplifting atmosphere.  Frankly, that's one of the reasons I fell in love with her.  Controlling the atmosphere of the home is probably the most important thing a keeper at home does. 

But now I'm rambling about something I don't really know much about.  Except that I love how my wife orchestrates our home.
//

Oh, and talk about a bad time to die

My Son

He's getting so big.  And cantankerous.

My poor wife has become such a trooper, taking care of the nighttime rituals so that I can get my 'beauty sleep' before the 6am alarm wakes both us and our neighbors.

That means I get to see the cute moments of life.  Like waking him up from his nap when I get home.  And holding the still sleepy bundle as he stretches and tries to orient himself to his world (yet again).

Our supper "conversation" tonight was great:

Little-G: BUUUUURRRP
Mama: "Oh my, what a good burp!!"
Little-G:"BUURP"
Mama:"Wow, you do that so well"
Little-G (Looking at her with big eyes): *Burp.
Mama: "You know, you don't have to do it just to impress me."

Ok, so I'm a first-time dad, but what gives? I love seeing little things in him that are so totally myself.  Here's to hoping he's easier to raise than I was.  All too soon he'll be crawling around here trying to pull the computer off the coffee table.  I can't wait for that day.

//
Ever wake up and not know who you were? Try being Benjamin Kyle.

(It's gonna take more than a double-shot of espresso to bring that guy around.)

//
Let mercy lead - Rich Mullins
Let love be the strength in your legs
And in every footprint that you leave

There'll be a drop of grace

If we can reach

   Beyond the wisdom of this age

Into the foolishness of God  -

That foolishness will save those who believe

Let mercy lead